Wordy Wednesday

It's supposed to be Wordless Wednesday but next week is Spring Break and apparently last week my seven professors had a secret meeting during which they decided to load me with so much freakin' work that I don't have time to find my camera, let alone take a picture!!! So ... on that note ... I will leave you with a cute little email that my friend Rebekah sent me today. I was supposed to be taking an online Biology quiz and instead I was reading emails and then writing this whiney posting. I am off to take that quiz now. Really. No more whining. I think that is #7 on my list of "to do's" today (out of something like 19) Ok. I am really done whining now. Thanks for the email Rebekah. HBLAMY :)

Dear Dogs and Cats:

The dishes with the paw print are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.

The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Beating me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run.

I cannot buy anything bigger than a king size bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm.

For the last time there is no secret exit from the bathroom. If by some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow and try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge and try to pull the door open. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years -- canine or feline attendance is not required.

The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's but. I CANNOT STRESS THIS ENOUGH!

To pacify you, my dear pets, I have posted the following message on our front door:

To all Non-Pet Owners Who Visit and Like to Complain About Our Pets:

1. They live here, you don't.
2. If you don't want their hair on your clothes stay off the furniture (that's why they call it FURniture).
3. I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.
4. To you it's an animal, to me he/she is an adopted son/daughter who is short, hairy, walks on all fours and doesn't speak clearly.

Remember in many ways, dogs and cats are better than kids because they:

1. Eat less
2. Don't ask for money all the time
3. Are easier to train
4. Normally come when called
5. Never ask to drive the car
6. Don't hang out with drug-using friends
7. Don't smoke or drink
8. Don't have to buy the latest fashions
9. Don't want to wear your clothes
10. Don't need a 'gazillion' dollars for college
And Finally
11. If they get pregnant, you can sell their children.

Muppet Show Monday

Spring Ahead (and I got a little off track)

Once a year we advance our clocks an hour so that the afternoons have more daylight and the mornings do not. Supporters of daylight savings time are retail establishments, sporting goods stores, the department of public safety (there are less car accidents), and kids who want to go and play outside in the evening. Critics of daylight savings time are farmers and economists. Apparently we use a lot more gas and electricity during DST.

Although DST is common in high latitudes, most of the world's people do not use it.
DST used: blue areas
DST no longer used: orange areas
DST never used: red areas

On a much smaller scale, DST means that getting ready for school this week is going to be heck around here and that yesterday I had a moment of panic that looked like this:

I was getting ready for my Tastefully Simple party when I first realized I had lost an hour. And let me tell you ... I needed every single minute I could find. All of a sudden I had 60 less minutes than I needed. Fortunately for me D.J. and Jennifer were the first two people to show up so I put them to work. D.J. had blender duty making Vanilla Bean Chiller and Jennifer made the Prickly Pear Cooler. Now, just to show you all that I am not a pushy salesperson and that I am as honest as I always claim to be ... I am going to tell you how we all felt about the Prickly Pear Cooler. And I can sum it all up by telling you what Kenny said when he tried it. He said, "It tastes just like Airborne!" And he's right. I love Tastefully Simple. I love their beer bread and dips like nothing else on earth. I could live on their soup. The new Classy Chocolate Pound Cake .... Oh. My. Goodness. It. Is. So. So. So. Good!!! But the Prickly Pear Cooler .... well, you can skip that. Wait a minute ... this post was supposed to be about the time change. Well, I guess since I got into my Tastefully Simple party I will show you those pictures too. Here is my spread:

And here are the boys chowing down on the leftovers:

I had a really fun & successful party. I think Lisa is safe from the quarterly Tastefully Simple business monsters for one more quarter. So thank you to everyone who came to my party yesterday, everyone who couldn't come but ordered online, and everyone who just reads my post anyway! Even though we've already made our goal you can still order some Tastefully Simple if you want to. My party will be open until the 15th. I would just avoid the Prickly Pear Cooler! Go to Lisa's website by clicking HERE.

Rattlesnake Roundup

Here are the long-anticipated Rattlesnake Roundup pictures. There were lots and lots of scary and smelly things to see, but not very many things that I wanted to get close enough to that I could take pictures of. Sorry this first picture is a little dark.

This is the snake pit that was next to the Longest Snake Contest. There were several men who were grabbing snakes with long hooks and putting them on a table to measure them. The longest snakes were being separated and the losers were tossed into big garbage barrels. I don't even want to know their fate.

The longest snakes were placed in these bins. The results are not yet published for this year, but in 2007 the longest snake was 80 inches. The all time Sweetwater record holder was 84 inches long!

This is the snake I saw them measuring when I worked my way through the crowd to get a good photo. This one was only 38 inches long.

Kenny and I were fascinated by the milking pit. This guy was grabbing rattlesnakes out of one barrel by their tails, milking them, then tossing them into another barrel at a rate of about three snakes per minute. He was so fast that I kept trying to take a picture of him and by the time I took the picture I just got a picture of him tossing the snake into the second barrel!

This is the snake handler. He taught a lesson about rattlesnakes and snake safety. Then he teased a snake with a balloon, which I took a video of for your entertainment. I am thinking there must be some animal (or reptile) rights groups out there that would probably not like this.

There were a lot of other things to see, but I had three problems. #1. There were 35,000 other people in Sweetwater with us. Sweetwater is 10.0 square miles. #2. My camera battery was really low so I kept saving it for something really good. And #3. Some of the things I saw were just too yucky!

Today's the Day

Today's the Rattlesnake Round-up. We're getting ready to go and the boys have a couple of jokes for ya'll:

Q? What do snakes put on their kitchen floors?
A: Rep-Tiles

Q? What do snakes do after they fight?
A: Hiss and make up.

Q? What's a snake's favorite subject?
A: Hiss-tory!

I found this online which is more along the lines of how I am feeling about what we might encounter today in Sweetwater:

What's the real difference between a Yankee Zoo and a Texas Zoo?
On the cage, a Yankee Zoo will have the name of the animal and then the scientific name in Latin.
Whereas, a Texas Zoo will have the name of the animal and the recipe.....!

Yup, I am a little worried! But we'll see how the day goes. Wish me luck!

I Never Thought I'd Say This!

Last weekend I was talking to my sister-in-law Lisa when I said a sentence I never imagined I could even think, let alone say. It went something like this: The tickets to the rodeo were sold out so Brian and I are going to take the boys to the rattlesnake roundup in Sweetwater instead. Yes, I said that. And worse, it was all true. I really tried to buy tickets to the rodeo and they really were sold out. I didn't even know something could sell out here in this tiny little West Texas town! And we really are going to take the boys to Sweetwater (don't you just love the name of that town?) to go to a rattlesnake roundup. What is a rattlesnake roundup, you ask? Even if you aren't asking I am going to tell you. This is from wikipedia.org:

A Rattlesnake Round-Up is a rodeo-like event common to rural Midwest where, rather than bovines, rattlesnakes are the primary animal attraction. The largest of the several Rattlesnake Round-Up events is in Sweetwater, Texas. Held every year since 1958, the event currently attracts approximately 35,000 visitors per year and results in the capture of 1% of the state's rattlesnake population.

So on Saturday we are going to Sweetwater to the rattlesnake roundup. There are several attractions including a rattlesnake parade, the Miss Snake Charmer Pageant, the weigh-in of the snakes, the showing of the rattlesnakes, a gun & knife show, indoor and outdoor flea markets, a brisket and chili cook-off, rattlesnake dancers, a rattlesnake meat eating contest, a carnival and a beard contest. I mean, what more could you ask for?!?

I promise pictures!

For My Mom

Gno Gnews is Good Gnews!

Muppet Show Monday

Recently I wrote about how we have rediscovered The Muppet Show. My good friend Mandy, who is usually very intelligent, did not click on the YouTube video I had in my posting because she thought I had somehow found a way to link an entire episode of the Muppets to my blog. Now I am not really sure if that is even possible, but I can assure you, I know you do not all share my fond memories of this show. When I think of The Muppet Show I am instantly reminded of how wonderful my childhood really was. I am one of those rare people who has no complaints and does not need therapy. I think of spending 30 minutes a week eating freshly popped popcorn huddled around our tv set, sitting on our soft brown velour sofa, wrapped up in cuddly blankets ... laughing at the Swedish Chef, Pigs in Space, Animal playing on the drums, and all of the other crazy Muppets on the show. Even though Brian and I saw them all several times in the 1970s we are still working our way through season one here in 2008. Yesterday we watched an episode that had "special guest star" Florence Henderson. Today's YouTube video is very short and has one of my all time favorite Muppet Show songs. So if you want to spend less than 2 minutes going down memory lane with me, click on it. Oh, and if you want to watch the original You Tube video I put on here a week or so ago that was a 38-second Swedish Chef video click HERE.

Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader Part II

Today is February 29th, in the Year of Our Lord 2008. Yadda, Yadda, Yadda.

When I picked up the boys from school we engaged in two conversations. One I could keep up and one I couldn't. The first went like this:

Kenny: There's a boy in my class that turned 2 today.
Me: That's so cool!
Kenny: And he's taller than me.
Me: And he's only 2?!?
Kenny: Yup, he has a leap year birthday.
Me: That's pretty special.
Kenny: So when I am 100 he'll only be 25.
Me: That's pretty young.
Kenny: Yup, that's cool. Can I have a snack when we get home?
Me: You sure can.

And the second:

Chase: Actually, he'll only be 24.
Me: And why is that?
Chase: We have a leap year every four years, unless the year is divisible by 100. That year is not a leap year. Well, with the exception of the years that are divisible by 400. They are still leap years. So 2000 was a leap year, but 2100, 2200, and 2300 will not be leap years. That is because the solar year is slightly less than 365.25 days.
Me: So do you want a snack when we get home too?

The Weather Around Here

Yesterday it was 92 degrees here. Now it is 36 with a high of 58. This place is crazy. Of course today is my walk5milesallovercampusday.
I know, I know ... quit whining and go get ready for class.

You Might Be a Redneck (February 2008 Edition)

...if your kids play in the sprinkler system in the middle of February!

Rodeo Parade

We went to the Rodeo Parade yesterday. I have never seen so many horses in one place in my life! I won't bore you with the endless pictures of horses and marching bands that I took. But I will share my three favorite pictures:

My cool boy up on a flower box trying to get a better view of the 10 year old cheerleaders.

The longhorn cow that some of you may remember from the boys' Christmas photo (we did two different photos for two different cards that I had).

And ... the best entertainment of the morning. These donkeys decided they were done walking. Done. This poor guy spent about 20 minutes pushing, pulling, whipping, begging, bribing, crying, etc. right here in front of us. About half of the parade passed right by him while he tried to convince his donkeys to pull his covered wagon. I don't know who the guy with the baseball cap (behind the covered wagon) is. He thought he'd try to help by chatting with the people inside the wagon. Somehow I don't think he was much help at all!

Anyway, the whole thing was rather entertaining. And a good way to get out of the house for a little while. Stay tuned later in the week for some Rodeo photos.

Making Donuts

We have a found some new to us and old to the rest of the world entertainment here in our house. Last weekend I went on You Tube and found several of these videos to show the boys. Being a generation X child (no patience) I immediately went to amazon.com and bought the entire first season of the Muppet Show. Have you seen this show lately? These people muppets are so funny!

My Ideal TV Boyfriend

I was supposed to be working on a paper that I have due next week. Instead I was surfing around other peoples' blogs reading about their lives. Sometimes interesting. Sometimes boring. It all seemed better than writing my paper at the time. Anyway, I came across this link for taking a quiz to figure out who my ideal TV boyfriend would be. And I swear I answered everything honestly and here he is ... McDreamy! I can't believe it! Maybe I shouldn't tell Brian. He already thinks that I am in love with this guy. Hm ... maybe I should get to that paper that I have due next week.

Who is Your Ideal TV Boyfriend?

More on Gossip Girl. Created by BuddyTV

Ok, blogger friends. Go out and take the quiz and let me know who your Ideal TV Boyfriend is. Because I am hoping that I am not the only one who doesn't have better things to do.

The One That Got Bumped

This picture was going to be my Worldless Wednesday before my redneck-in-training won the spelling bee yesterday. Believe it or not this is the car of the local Bail Bondsman of our town here in West Texas. Really. And ... (yes, this story gets better) When I showed the picture in my camera to my friend in class yesterday she immediately recognized it and said, "Oh, the bail bondsman's car?" ... like it was just a normal part of this wonderful little place I live in. Well, I guess it is. Only in Texas, only in Texas!

Wordless Wednesday -- Scripps National Spelling Bee: School Champ!

At Least They Had a Good Day

Do you know what today is? It is President Day. It is a federal holiday. The post office was closed today. Federal banks were closed today. Most of my friends in other states in this great union had their kids home with them today. The entire United States Army had the day off. I would be willing to guess President Bush had the day off. Or at least he probably would have if his approval rating was better than 30% right now. I had class, but luckily for me Monday is a late day and my first class was canceled so we all slept in nice and late. It was a great day. I pretended I was a stay-at-home mom all morning. I made belgian waffles for breakfast. I baked banana bread. I cleaned the house. I finished the laundry. I studied for a test I have tomorrow. Brian and the boys played basketball, walked the dogs, played frisbee, went hiking, and rode their 4-wheeler. Then after lunch I went to class. When my friend Chelsea sat down next to me I noticed she was wearing her school disctrict badge. The badge she has to wear when she goes into the elementary school for her observation time. I said, "Chelsea, why are you wearing your badge? The kids didn't have school today." She said, "Yes, they did." I said, "But it's President's Day!" Then I started thinking ... how can they get a day off for the stock show? How can they get a day off for the rodeo? How can the entire United States Army take a day off and my kids are supposed to be in school on President's Day? And they are home playing frisbee with their dad right this very minute?!? I won't be winning any Mother of the Year Awards for this little mistake!

Why I Love Summer Vacation

I am sitting here trying desperately to study for an exam I have tomorrow. I have the old computer in front of me. There is a slide show of 2005 summer vacation photos going past on the screen. How in the world am I supposed to be able to concentrate when this goes past my screen?

While the Cat is Away

...the mice will play!

Yesterday I spent a couple of hours in the library at the college campus getting some work done on a paper that I have due this week. This is a picture I just found on my camera:

Rites of Passage

All around the world people use different rituals to initiate their young into adulthood. For example, the Rastafarians use marijuana just before puberty. They say that it binds the group of adolescents. The Surfista (young teen boys) in Rio ride on top of a train ducking overhead rails and wires. Vanuatu boys (Brazil) dive from 50 ft towers with elastic vines tied to a foot just long enough to stop them from crashing (we would call this Bungee jumping). Here at our house we have finally taken a step with our older redneck in training. He has crossed that threshold toward manhood.

He drank Nyquil!